Alex

Entry for July 29, 2008

Daryl.W

22/07/08

My youngest daughter has been living with me for some time now. We share a fairly close relationship as you would expect with a 13 year old and her father. And given that I am the primary caregiver and have to buy and discuss feminine hygiene products and take her to do her own underwear shopping etc, we don’t have a lot of secrets.

However – today, something happened.

It started in the morning when her cell phone couldn’t be found. It was discovered missing at the last moment before leaving for the train station and due to the timing we couldn’t mount a very thorough search. Being that she had netball training in the afternoon we decided the best thing to do was for her to borrow a friend’s phone on the train journey home and she would message me to let me know when to pick her up. 4:30 rolled around and I still hadn’t heard from her and decided it might be best to head to the train station in case there were no friends on the train who could lend her a phone.

At 5:30 I was starting to wonder if we had failed to communicate and I decided to message her netball coach to see what time they finished training. I was still waiting for an answer at 5:45 when a message from Alex’s phone comes through explaining how the phone was in her school bag the whole time yay, yay and all that.

Sweet - a) She’s o.k.

b) She’s found her phone.

c) She’s 5 min’s away.

So we head our way off home and at the first set of lights I get a message from the netball coach.

“No trayn’n 2day, 2 wet, had a quick meeting & all finishd @ 3:30”

Hmmmmm.

So I figured – it takes approximately 20 min’s to get from school to the station where I pick her up.

So something went on for two hours.

I decided that I wouldn’t ask any questions or tell her I had spoken to the coach, if she didn’t want to be up front with me she must have a good reason and I wasn’t about to cause her any embarrassment.

I think its boys – I hope its boys.

The curiosity is killing me.

Of cavities and super glue pt3

Entry for July 08, 2008

I would have to say that today was a particularly good day.

As per my last post, today was foremost ‘dentist day’.

I decided that seeing as the day was going to be cut reasonably short anyway it would be a good idea to book my truck in for a warrant of fitness in the morning, that way I could walk back to my house from the testing workshop and spend the morning lounging around waiting for my vehicle to be tested and trying to calm myself in the face of the slowly rising sense of dread for the afternoons coming events.

I had given my truck the once over and figured I was up for at least a couple of hundred dollars worth of remedial maintenance work that I simply couldn’t be assed doing myself before it would be given the o.k. So you can imagine my utter disbelief when I front up to the testing workshop to have the mechanic say “sweet as bro, she’s all good and that’ll be $40” – Stoked! So far so good, let’s just hope the dentist’s appointment goes half as well.

Yesterday, I decided, being that I could now open my mouth wide enough to get my fingers in there, that I should check the offending tooth for looseness. This was a decision I soon came to regret – I can’t be certain but I believe at the first touch I may have gone into shock and passed out for several moments because apart from a return of that obnoxiously loud gong and the lightening I can’t really remember a great deal. I resurfaced still atop my seat (thankfully) at the dining table but the left hand side of my face had been repeatedly bashed by some mysterious invisible assailant armed with a mallet. Was it wiggly? I had no idea and was not soon about to check again!

So back to today - at about 2.00PM I made my way over to Titirangi to meet my new dentist. His name is Rashid and I’m starting to dread even his name. I kept thinking to myself ‘gawd don’t let him be one of those officious little Indian bastards that comes off all – ‘you are velly, velly silly man’ because at this point I am a silly man with a very sore tooth, no patience and my nerves are pretty well shot as well.

Fuck with me now bastard and Im going to punch someone, mostly YOU!

Turns out I couldn’t have got it more wrong. Rashid is a young guy who greets me with a completely kiwi accent and a flippant sort of “gidday mate, hows that bloody tooth”.

You can’t begin to imagine the degree of relief that I was feeling about then.

So he gets me into the chair of great pain and death and he’s so casual and friendly that I’m starting to feel a bit guilty about the sort of mess I’ve made with all the super glue and Iodine and Janola that this really nice guy is going to have to now deal with. So I start to confess to my multiple sins before he has to have a look in there and he stops and listens while explain that it might be a little difficult to see exactly what’s going on due to my having to temporarily fill the cavity because the pain was a little intense.

Now - I’m expecting his attitude to go from amicable to scolding but no – third nice surprise for the day, he puts his tools back down and with a look I couldn’t really read having just met him, asks me to explain to him again the process for filling tooth cavities with liquid acrylic.

He laughed so hard it was a bit frightening and when he realized I hadn’t convinced somebody to drip the glue in the cavity but had managed to get it in there by myself with only minor inconvenience, I thought he was going to wet himself.

He finally composed himself and started to examine my teeth and asked me why I had not filled out my doctor’s name and the date of my last doctor’s visit on the questionnaire I had filled out in reception earlier. When I had made my appointment last week I had mentioned the infection that was ravaging my gum and jaw and he assumed I must have done a course of anti-biotics for that to have been cleared up.

Again he put down his tools and listened to my method of infection containment and once again he laughed so hard when I told him about the Janola and Iodine rinse that he had a little coughing fit and had to get himself a small glass of water.

Anyway he looks at the bastard tooth and without a moments hesitation says to me “yup, it’s got to go”.

Sweet no shitty root canal for Daryl.

So – a quick x-ray and two injections later and we’re good to go.

A bit of grunting, a couple of slip off’s, some weird creaking noises and the cursed tooth is gone.

Bliss.

After he cleaned the tooth up a bit he got out his camera and a little note book and started to examine it taking photos and writing notes in his book. He took the time to show me where the glue had run into the tooth and rather than fill the entire cavity it had instead made it’s way around the inside of the cavity and sealed the nerve endings into their canals. I guess it’s hard or illegal to find guinea pigs in this field to try these things out on so they gather what information they can from fools like me who try things out on themselves. The bottom line was he felt that really I should be applauded for being innovative in the face of a desperate situation and that Iodine rinses work extremely well on mouth infections, so no harm was really done. 4th nice surprise for the day.

It is only fair to admit at this stage that he was not impressed when I told him, in answer to his question, that the reason my teeth were so very white at the front in comparison to the back was most likely due to my discovery that, Jiff works really well on teeth. And despite my protestations that the labeling gave strong indications that it would not damage enamel and did not operate by harsh scratching he would not be convinced

Ah well two out of three aint bad.

Rashid likes me and he is my friend.

It was a good day.

Of cavities and super glue pt2

Entry for July 08, 2008

So, to the events following my last post -:

Well eventually the fantastic cyanoacrylate filler I had managed to administer to the cavity in my wisdom tooth fell out. Having had such an enormous degree of success with the first application it only seemed sensible to proceed immediately with a repeat effort. And although I did finally triumph over the various obstacles this procedure offers it wasn’t without its mishaps - the least of which found my fingers thoroughly adhered to my goatee and a reasonable sized blob of acrylic stuck firmly to the hair and skin on the inside of my left nostril.

Nonetheless I was once again free from the agony that wisdom teeth can bring, or so it seemed...

As it turned out the gum directly around and below the tooth had become infected and despite pouring ever more glue into my mouth a small but certain level of pain persisted and continued to increase over the following days.

Having had some degree of success in the past with a Janola gargle I decided the time for a new attempt was indeed ripe.

Let it now be said – do not try this at home kids! Janola is truly the household cleaner that keeps on giving. Over the following hours my attempts to rinse the ghastly stuff from my mouth seemed only to regenerate its flavor! And so, with gums steaming, eyes streaming and the inside of my cheeks closely resembling the bottom of a budgie cage I staggered to my car and blundered recklessly to the chemist and bought myself a bottle of Iodine solution – the effects of which, when diluted correctly were far more optimal than the nasty old Janola rinse, although truth be told the initial reaction between the two was quite spectacular!

Four days later and I had managed to get hold of the infection to such a degree that I could now open my maw wide enough to shovel teaspoonfuls of food in and with the food came the eventual return of my sense of humor.

It was probably two days later when the letter from my daughter’s dentist turned up in the mail to remind me that her yearly checkup was due.

I took it as a sign and made the decision to make an appointment for myself at the same time as making one for her.

The infection has cleared up completely now so next week when I hear those dreaded words “open wide now” it won’t be necessary to strike the poor man in the scrotum.

Of cavities and super glue pt1

Entry for July 08, 2008

Confession time.

I haven’t been to the dentist for 25 years, I haven’t had to.

I brush morning and night and any other time I think I should.

Funny enough I was only recently bragging about the virtues of my invulnerable pearly whites and lo several weeks later whilst picking my teeth with a small thumbtack - I discovered a cavity!

JESUS WEPT!

Now that shit hurts.

Having only had three cavities in my life and all but one of them at primary school, I can’t remember what tooth pain feels like. The way it wraps itself around the top of your head and makes one eye water. The way you lose any sense of which tooth hurts because it feels like your whole jaw has just been smashed by a hammer. Special.

Anyway, after the initial discovery I tried my best to put it out of mind. And basically for about 6 months my cavity and I shared a reasonably peaceful co-existence.

That time is now over.

The pain sort of comes and goes. But the other day, the pain stayed.

I called a dentist I was recommended and asked if he would pull that big ole bad boy out. He advised me to visit the hygienist for a couple of appointments and then he would have a look at what could be done with the tooth. Frightening how short tempered you become with a tooth ache.

An idea had been brewing in the back of my mind ever since I first discovered this cavity. I probably shouldn’t even be talking about this but… I wondered what would happen if I bunged up the hole with super glue. It seemed to me that the problem was that the tender little nervy bits inside the tooth were a little exposed now that the tooth around them had gone. Soooo if instead of tooth there was a thick layer of acrylic stopping the tender bits from feeling cold wind or fluid a great deal of pain might be avoided.

I’ve been using the stuff for years on the kids and my own wounds and it seemed to be quite safe and a whole heap more efficient than sticky plasters.

I got to work yesterday and after my morning cup of tea collapsed into a state of shock as the sugar smote me directly in the cavity. My god that is outstanding!

So with one hand clapped across my head and the other held out in front of me so as to avoid stumbling into anything while I floundered blindly across the workshop I struggled my way to the nearest desk I knew had a bottle of Loctite 406.

Now despite the blinding pain and the deafening crashing in my ears the voice of reason did manage to make itself heard and I admit for an instant I felt some degree of trepidation. The damn stuff is so viscous and so quickly heated by body temp that it’s virtually impossible to tell that you’ve got it on your skin – what if I fill my whole mouth with the sticky shit and glue my whole mouth shut.

Several more lightening flashes of bright light and the striking of a very large and ancient gong that seems to want to split my head from ear to ear and I’ve got the tip of the bottle jammed into the cursed cavity. I tilted my head to one side and gave a gentle squeeze.

There was no taste, no smell, no feeling whatsoever, until suddenly the back of my throat set. Gawd! Then my cheek stuck to my teeth and my tongue set to the bottom of my mouth faaaaarrrrkkkkk. I tried desperately not to panic and interestingly the lightening and the gong had vanished from existence in that single moment.

As it turns out (I did quite a bit of research – later) cyanoacrylate sets instantly on contact with water and although I had quite a bit of it stuck to my cheeks and tongue because they were wet when I applied the stuff it didn’t really bond. So effectively I ended up with a mouthful of harmless thin plastic and after a couple of minutes my cheeks and tongue came undone.

Yeah, yeah it wasn’t all that great an experience and it took another five minutes or so to get rid of most of the excess but...

The glue flowed nicely into the cavity on both sides and the bottom and went off like cement. The relief was almost instantaneous I would have to say from a pain level of 8 out of 10 to a barely noticeable 2 out of 10. Twenty minutes later I would say 0 out of 10 and apart from the rough edges here and there and the odd bit of plastic stuck under my tongue I could drink chilled water and breath air over the tooth again. Magic!

As I mentioned earlier I have done a lot of research into this field since and although nobody recommends this practice as opposed to proper dental treatment it is common practice in many emergency wards and has been used as a temporary fix by many expedition medics involved in climbing, trekking and hunting safaris. It is very low in toxicity and although originally designed for use in making rifle sights it didn’t really become a hit until the early 70’s when it was first used by surgeons to stitch together a human liver.

So if you ever wake up in the early hours of the morning with you ears ringing and the feeling of a very large vice being slowly tightened around your jaw remember, if your very careful not to get the shit in your eyes or better still you have a partner who is as adventurous as you are incapacitated bust out the super glue and fill that sucker with acrylic.

Revenge

Entry for April 08, 2008 Revenge

Revenge is a dish best - ordered!

Have you noticed that most queues move slowest when it’s your lunch break?

It’s probably just that you’re somewhat more conscious of the time but it’s frustrating nonetheless.

Today I found myself in a queue at the McDonalds in the local mall. It wasn’t as long as it sometimes can be, but it was moving about as fast as the queue on vasectomy day at the local doctor’s surgery.

I know it sounds impatient of me, but I have obviously been laboring under the delusion that fast food - was fast! So waiting in a queue for five minutes during your lunch break is much like pulling teeth with a pair of very powerful yet small tweezers.

I waited another two minutes so I could say to myself I had given them a fair try and then I spat the proverbial dummy.

I was just frumping away when a young lady armed with a P.E.T finished with the pair a ways from me and shuffled toward me and asked if I would like to place my order.

Given my level of dissatisfaction at this point the opportunity she offered me was irresistible…

“Ahhhh, yes” I responded.

With that, I proceeded to order most of the items for sale that would require making, entirely to order and also require the most expensive condiments. I figured approximately $70 – $80 worth.

She handed me a little slip of yellow paper and blithely wandered off to the next unfortunate.

I took this as my cue to slip away un-noticed - and proceeded immediately to the nearest Burger King.

Ah… how satisfying.

Filet o fish be damned.

Daryl W.

08/04/2008

Dreams

Entry for April 07, 2008

Have you ever had a dream you could fly?

Did you wake up with the memory so vivid that you still believed you could!

Isn’t that so cool!

It stays with you sometimes until you try again and then realize that the wondrous light feeling you felt in the dream isn’t with you in wakey time.

Quite often when I’m just about to fall asleep or awaken, my dreams become most lucid.

I flicker, somewhere between what is and - what might be. Details that flash across my mind seem to have originated from a single moment and become part of who I am and what I am - almost like a memory, even though that moment only just, came to exist.

Hmmmmmm…

I love this experience.

I go to bed at night wishing for another. Every night - another…

In these moments everything – anything is possible!

Sure it’s not really what some around us might call - real. But for just that small moment it is… and money or anything for that matter could never put you closer.

Isn’t being human fantastic!

I love it!

(Never believe for one instant – that thoughts that exists in your mind are not real)

Daryl W.

07/04/2008

Of Trains...

Trains

With my daughter Alex starting a new school this year a review was needed in the area of transportation.

The options where reasonably simple: catch the bus, catch the train or the least reliable of them all – catch a ride with dad. The bus was ruled out almost immediately as that would require more than one and catching a ride with dad was less than optimal, due to the time we would have to rise in the morning in order to make the trip time less than an hour due to rush hour traffic. It was agreed then that the train was in fact the best option.

Admission time –

I had, until this time, never ridden on a train.

Worked on them – yes, traveled as a passenger - no.

Why, well to be honest, it has always seemed fundamentally wrong to me that an object weighing several hundred ton and packed with human lives is propelled down a steel track at pace and the “driver” doesn’t have a steering wheel! I know, I know naïve and foolish but it just never seemed right.

I feel like a bit of a baby now having said that.

Anyway, we made our way to the train station in Henderson where I was to discover the first surprise of the day, trains come every fifteen min’s – what! Not randomly and unpredictably with timetables that change daily and without notice like the bus, but every fifteen min’s, I’m impressed. Further to that, the train we are wanting to catch is early, yes that’s right early and unlike the bus has not simply carried on to the next stop so the smirking driver can ignore the people running desperately towards the stop, no it is stopped and waiting. We board to find the coaches well lit, tidy and air conditioned; this only seems to be getting better!

There’s a strange feeling of superiority attached to riding a train I discovered. It comes from watching everything from pedestrians to Kenworth trucks stopping and waiting as you sail serenely past at a level crossing.
Lovely

So twenty five minutes later we rock our way into Baldwin Ave stop, some, oh I don’t know, twenty five minutes faster than I could have managed it in the car!

Suffice to say; I am now a huge train convert, not only is the train prompt, predictable and reliable, it’s cheap! It costs me twenty dollars a week to send my daughter to school and wouldn’t you know it there’s a train station at the bottom of the street my work is situated on.

All I can say is if you haven’t taken a train ride lately through your local area try it, you may be as pleasantly surprised as me.

Daryl W.
19/03/2008